So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Text me some of your sweat
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
