sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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