Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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