You really coming over, don't trick.
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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