Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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