what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
