whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
