ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
