You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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