She said her name was "party"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
is that a dick in a sweater?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
