I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
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