your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
