Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
