i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
