I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
