Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
