Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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