He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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