these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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