was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
