Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
She even gives head with a lisp.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
