You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Found the puke drawer
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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