when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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