And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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