I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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