yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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