he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
