He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
