plz talk dirty to me
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
