Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
