Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize