PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
