"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
