I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
