I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i already hear my dad disowning me
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
