So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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