I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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