he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
