No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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