Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
