im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize