And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
