I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
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