The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
