I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
