If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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