is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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