i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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