I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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