its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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